Deleted user
What song does a cat like best?
Three Blind Mice .
What song does a cat like best?
Three Blind Mice .
I used to be scared of speed bumps.
I’m slowly getting over it.
What kind of pants do ghosts wear?
Boo-jeans .
My can opener broke …
Now it’s a can’t opener.
What do you give a vampire when he’s sick?
Coffin drops .
Your nose will never be 12 inches long
Because then it would be a foot
Who isn’t hungry at Thanksgiving?
The turkey—he’s already stuffed .
What kind of bird doesn't know the words to their own song?
A humming bird
How do you fix a cracked pumpkin?
A pumpkin patch .
Everyone have a nice weekend
Thanks, you too Kitraina!
Why did the turkey cross the road twice?
To show he wasn’t a chicken .
What’s the difference between in-laws & out-laws?
Outlaws are wanted.
What smells the best at Thanksgiving dinner?
Your nose .
What does a white hat dropped into the Red Sea become?
Wet
What do you call a rabbit who tells jokes?
A funny bunny .
My dad used to hit me with cameras
I still have flashbacks
Did you hear about the Italian chef that died?
He pasta-way .
I bought a pen that can write underwater.
It can write other words as well.
I like elephants.
Everything else is irrelephant .
I have a friend wo writes songs about sewing machines.
He's a Singer songwriter, or sew it seams.
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
An in-vest-igator .
If I had 50 cents for every Math exam I failed…
I'd have $8.40.
Wife: “How do I look?”
Husband: “With your eyes .”
Funny stuff
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